3: 3
I took the bracelet off and put it back in the jewelry box.
When Tyler woke, he saw me first and shot to his feet.
Clarissa's hand slipped free of his, and she mumbled, half-asleep,
"Come lie back down with me for a while, Tyler."
The air went quiet for a few seconds.
He pulled me into the master bedroom, shut the door, and cupped my face.
"She threw up all over herself last night. I was afraid she'd choke, so I stayed to watch her. Nothing happened. You know I wouldn't touch her."
"I didn't ask."
"You looking at me like this is worse than being grilled."
When I said nothing, he pressed my hand flat against his chest and bent his head with a small laugh.
"Feel that and tell me. When have I ever lied to you about something like this?"
Back when we'd first married, he used to wait for me at the company's back door.
One night I worked until dawn, and he fell asleep in the car. When he woke, his first words weren't a complaint. He asked if I was hungry.
The porridge shop by the road had already closed, and he knocked on the owner's door anyway until he got the last bowl of oatmeal.
I'd always believed a man willing to wait for me late into the night wouldn't make me wait too long.
That day, right in front of me, he had his assistant confirm Clarissa's moving date three days out.
That evening he made soup himself, not a sprig of cilantro in it, and even set my spoon on the left the way I liked.
At dinner he laid his phone face down on the table.
The dozen-odd messages Clarissa sent, he didn't answer a single one.
"She can pick her own memorial photo. She can find a lawyer for the will. It's not my problem."
He said,
"I promised to stay with you, so I'm staying with you."
I asked,
"You're really not going?"
"Why are you still hoping I'll go?"
He flicked my forehead.
"I set the phone here because I trust you not to drag this out forever. She can't take me from you. What are you so afraid of?"
After dinner he took me downstairs for a walk, and dug a flattened citrus candy out of his pocket.
"Our first date, you complained the movie was depressing, snuck a piece of candy, and got caught. Remember?"
He unwrapped it and slipped it into my mouth.
"Mrs. Delgado, how about a stay of execution?"
The candy was sweet.
The streetlights stretched our shadows long, as if the Tyler from years ago had come back, the one who'd had nothing but always kept me behind him.
I thought about it, giving him one more chance.
That night he slept with his arms around me.
I woke in the middle of the night and reached for the person beside me.
He was still there, his arm across my waist.
Feeling me stir, he kept his eyes shut and pulled me closer.
"Don't be scared. I'm here."
I stared at the familiar ridge of his brow and believed things would go back to where they'd been.
The next day I went to the office to hand things over and came home early to grab some documents.
The study door wasn't shut all the way, and Clarissa's voice came from inside.
"Your wife doesn't like me calling you my old companion, so now you won't take care of me?"
Tyler sighed.
"I will, but within limits. I bought the plot, I set up the pension. Just stop showing up in front of her."
"She doesn't want limits. She wants you to throw me out."
A pause, and then he laughed once.
"Her temper flares fast and dies fast. Once the IVF goes smoothly and there's a baby, she won't have time to watch all this."
I stood outside the door, my fingers slowly tightening.
So it turned out he hadn't stayed last night because he'd finally figured out who to choose. He'd just decided it was easier to smooth me over first.
Clarissa asked again,
"So if she and I ended up in the hospital at the same time, who would you go to first?"
Tyler's tone was light, as if the answer needed no thought at all.
"She can take care of herself. You can't."
He'd once used that line to praise me.
Later it became the reason I got left behind, every single time.
I didn't push the door open. I turned and went to the hospital.
The doctor said my lining wasn't in good shape, that a hysteroscopy should be scheduled as soon as possible, or the next cycle would be pushed back too.
Filling in the family contact number, I gave Tyler's out of habit.
At the last digit I paused, then wrote it down anyway.
The nurse handed the form back for me to confirm.
Under the words emergency contact, his name lay there quietly.
I looked at it for a long time before I signed my own name.
That was the last time I put him in that box.
