I looked up at Mom while clinging to one last thread of hope.
"I've never cared about the amount of money that you give me, Mom. I don't need a laptop, and I don't need a trip to Enora. I just want to experience the things that rightfully belong to me. Am I wrong for thinking that way?
"I want to know without a doubt that you and Dad will always be my pillars of support during my 18th birthday."
I wished that I could cut my heart from my chest and show her my inner thoughts. I wanted her to know that I had strived to be as mature as possible in the last 18 years—to know that I had always been understanding of their plights.
But what about Mom? Why was she staying silent? Why wasn't she tripping over herself to give me an explanation and promise that she would compensate me?
Why wasn't she crying while telling me that she had her reasons? Why wasn't she telling me that I was the only daughter that she loved?
"Say something!" I shouted as I shoved her.
Mom was shocked by my sudden outburst. She frantically tried to pull me into her arms, but I dodged away.
Silence descended upon us, leaving only the sounds of my muffled crying.
A long time passed before Mom finally said, "I know that you've had a hard time in the last few years. Your 18th birthday is coming up. We'll definitely—"
"I want to have a party in the five-star hotel in the city," I blurted out, interrupting her impatiently. "I want to invite all my classmates."
I was testing Mom to see if she would choose me, her biological daughter.
The air around us seemed to freeze.
Just then, Mom's phone started ringing with her special ringtone.
Her face twisted slightly when she glanced at the screen, and she moved to reject the call.
However, I snatched the phone away before she could do so.
I was seconds away from answering the call when Mom suddenly shouted, "Okay! Dad and I will host a five-star birthday party for you!"
The name continued to flash on the screen, stinging my eyes.
However, I halted my movements. My nerve failed me, and I lost the strength to answer the call; I didn't want to lose the affections that so rarely came my way.
There was a wicked voice screaming within me. "I have to prove that I'm better than her!"
I nodded and returned Mom's phone to her.
Mom turned off her phone and sat with me as we planned my birthday party.
I surrendered to the warmth spreading through me, fully aware that it was a hollow charade.
After that, Mom took me shopping for new clothes.
When I exited the changing room, I caught her speaking to someone on the phone.
"Okay. I'll come over right now…" she said in the same gentle tone that she had used to lie to me countless times.
However, I knew that her gentleness was genuine this time.
Mom hastily scanned the QR code to pay for my clothes, saying, "Pack up all the clothes that she tried just now."
She then turned to me and said, "I have some urgent business to attend to. I'll be back later to make dinner for you."
I suddenly burst out laughing as I listened to the endless beeping that resounded from the cash register.
I finally owned clothes that were worth more than 100 dollars, but in exchange, Mom abandoned me.
The metallic taste of blood permeated my tongue.
The sales assistant told me that I had such a loving mother, but I couldn't shake the feeling that I had been abandoned by the entire world.
I clenched my fists, feeling at a loss for what to do.
Didn't I already give up on pursuing the truth? Why did Mom abandon me again when I was already turning a blind eye to their lies?
My body moved before my mind registered what I was doing.
…
I tailed Mom to the five-star hotel that she had posted about.
It was my first time stepping foot in such an extravagant establishment.
I felt like a thief sneaking into a banquet and had trouble regulating my breathing.
The receptionist curiously eyed my jacket that had faded from countless washes before his gaze strayed to the branded shopping bags I was holding.
I said before he could get a word in, "I'm looking for my mother. She booked a hall here for my birthday party—"
The receptionist swiftly called his colleague over before I could finish my sentence. "Please escort Ms. Shore to Room 803. She's one of our esteemed guests…"
The hotel staff member blabbered on and on about how grand the banquet was going to be as we entered the elevator.
"Business has been bad recently. It's been five or six years since we received such a huge order. Your parents must love you dearly. I hear that you're an only child?"
My heart twisted painfully as I stood outside the room. I had accepted the keycard from the hotel staff member, but I was getting cold feet at the last second.
If I didn't walk through the door, I could still preserve the illusion that Mom, Dad, and I were a happy family.
However, I also knew that a temporary bubble of happiness would pop sooner or later.
