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The night the college applications were due, an alert lit up my phone in the middle of the night: A new device has logged into your application account. Please check whether your password has been compromised.
It startled me. I wanted to wake my parents and figure out what to do.
Then, without meaning to, I heard them talking.
My mother sighed. "Nora's scores are high enough for a top-tier school. If we change hers to a private community college, do you think she'll hold it against us?"
My father didn't care. "It's fine. Once the acceptance letter comes, we'll smooth it over."
My mother made a low sound of agreement. "That way Nora and Emma will be at the same school. With Nora looking after Emma, I can stop worrying."
I stood outside the door, cold all over.
Emma Simmons is my sister. Her SAT scores were terrible, so a private community college was all she could get into.
But it never occurred to me that, just so I'd go to school with her, my parents would change my applications.
My whole life, I'd been the one overlooked, the one told to give things up.
But this time they wanted me to give up my own future.
I wanted out of this family.
……
I quietly deleted the message and left the applications the way they were.
Because I knew my parents would check again in a few days.
I lay in bed and cried the whole night.
For as long as I could remember, my parents had said I was the older sister, that I should let my little sister have her way.
She picked her toys first. I ate whatever food she left behind.
When we started school, Emma said she was scared the other kids would pick on her.
So my parents filed for me to take a year off, kept me home doing housework for a year, and enrolled me together with her the next year.
In their eyes, my life was just something to be sacrificed for hers.
It was almost dawn before I finally drifted into a shallow sleep.
When I got up, I walked out of my room with both eyes swollen.
My parents and Emma had already finished eating. All that was left on the table was a plate of watery vegetables and half a cold biscuit.
My father didn't notice my red, swollen eyes. He just said, annoyed, "Look how late it is and you're only getting up now. Lazy as ever."
I didn't say anything. I chewed the cold biscuit in silence.
My mother said, half joking, "Nora, you're going to college now. You'll be an adult soon. You can earn your own tuition. We're done covering you."
"I found you a summer job at an electronics factory. It's hard work, but the pay is good, so you'd better put your back into it."
My head snapped up. Flatly, I asked, "Is Emma going too?"
My mother gave a little cough. "No, not her. She's never had it rough, and she's clumsy, not quick like you. She'd never last at a factory."
I pressed on. "Then what about her tuition?"
My father frowned, displeased. "Do you even have to ask? You're the older sister. What's wrong with helping carry it?"
Something in me went cold.
The same thing, again. Always the same thing.
My whole life I'd swallowed it. My whole life I'd held it in.
But this time, I didn't want to hold it in anymore.
I stood up and said, deliberately, "Why should I?"
In all my life, it was the first time I'd ever pushed back.
And those three words sent my father into a rage.
He slammed the table. "You're asking why? We're your parents. On what grounds did we raise you all these years? By that same logic, you're the older sister, so shouldn't you look after your sister?"
"Did you read all those books with your head up your backside? You can't even grasp that?"
My mother pulled me aside and sighed. "Nora, you're smart, you know how things work. Your sister's nowhere near you. You have to help her."
Emma hugged my arm too. "Sis, I'll learn from you, I promise. I'll make Mom and Dad proud."
It sounded lovely. But I knew Emma was the one they were actually proud of.
She'd been sweet-mouthed and quick with words since she was little, the darling of the whole family.
With my mother's coaxing, I was delivered to the gates of the electronics factory.
She dropped me off and hurried away with Emma.
Twenty minutes later, I saw Emma post online: "Thanks, Mom, for my back-to-school gift."
It was the newest phone.
Before the SATs, my parents had promised to buy one phone each for me and Emma.
But afterward they never brought it up again.
I understood how hard they worked, so I never asked.
Only now did I get it. They hadn't forgotten. They'd only ever meant to buy one for Emma.
I sighed and walked through the factory gates.
The man in charge of hiring gave me a glance. "Nora Simmons, right? Your parents already told me your situation."
He pulled out an onboarding form. "Just sign here. Once you sign, you'll get your uniform, and I'll take you to the assembly line."
As I was about to sign, I glanced at the details on the form, and I froze.
