What was so hard about her life?
She breezed through eight years of school without a care in the world, landed a job at a design firm right after graduation, and had a bright future stretching out ahead of her.
I'd slaved away for thirteen years. My body was wrecked, my looks destroyed, and because I never finished middle school, I couldn't even qualify for the easier positions.
If anything, I wished I'd been the one sent to live with relatives.
I was shaking with rage. Desiree wrapped her arms around me, her voice gentle and soothing.
"Letitia, if you need to blame someone, blame me. Please don't blame Egbert."
"We're truly in love. I'm begging you, give us your blessing."
Everyone looked at her with approval, admiring her kindness. Even knowing she was superior to me in every way, in looks and education, she was still willing to be considerate of my feelings. A failure's feelings.
But what no one noticed was that the words Desiree whispered in my ear told a very different story.
"Letitia, let me tell you something."
"Thirteen years ago, we both got a fried egg. You got yours at the dinner table. I got mine in the kitchen. Mom said if it weren't for the fact that you absolutely had to have one, both of them would've been mine."
"And last night, my noodles had two eggs. Yours had none."
So that bowl of egg noodles had nothing to do with reward or punishment. It was nothing but our parents playing favorites, through and through.
My eyes nearly split with fury. But she held me tight, her arms like a vise.
"Egbert wrote you letters. I intercepted every single one. I went after him on purpose, made him fall for me little by little."
"If I'd known you'd come back from the frontier looking like this, I wouldn't have even bothered pretending. Because right now, you're not even worth comparing to me."
The moment the words left her mouth, she staggered back two steps and tumbled down the stairs.
Mom slapped me so hard my head snapped to the side. "If anything happens to Desiree, I will never forgive you!"
Dad looked stricken with grief. "You'd lay hands on your own sister over a man? Are you even human?"
Egbert's face was full of disappointment. "Your sister told me your personality had changed, and I didn't believe her. Now I see she was being generous. You're vicious."
I pressed my hand to my burning cheek. The hatred inside me burrowed from my heart into my bones like worms, gnawing, flaying me alive.
If it weren't for me, our parents never would have made it back from the frontier in one piece.
If it weren't for me, Egbert would have died at three years old.
That day, I flipped the table. I screamed like a madwoman, pouring out every injustice festering inside me.
"Mom! You remember that Desiree loves peanuts, but you don't even know I'm allergic to them! I was hospitalized ten times for allergic reactions. Three of those times I nearly died!"
"Dad! All you ever did was hold Desiree and paint with her. All I ever got was cold words. 'You're too stupid. Instead of wasting time learning to paint, you should help out around the house so you can find a good man to marry someday.' We're both your daughters! Why did you treat us so differently?"
"Egbert, we grew up together! You promised you'd never marry anyone but me. I will die before I agree to let you marry Desiree!"
The room went terrifyingly silent.
Everyone stared at me. There was no shock at our parents' favoritism. No judgment of Desiree for benefiting from it all.
Only disgust at me for being ungrateful.
Dad looked at me quietly, the way you'd look at a child throwing a senseless tantrum.
"Letitia, you've gone too far. Making this kind of scene over a wedding? Where's your dignity? Your mother and I have always treated you and your sister equally. We've never played favorites. You had bad luck and didn't get the egg. Why are you taking it out on your sister?"
"I'm telling you right now: Egbert doesn't want you. You will accept that."
In the end, I was locked away as punishment.
Six days in a pitch-black room with no light.
No one brought water. No one brought food. I starved to death.
In the last moment before my eyes closed for good, all I could hear were firecrackers shaking the sky. Everyone was celebrating Desiree and Egbert's wedding.
