3: 3
That night, it took everything I had not to break.
I pushed Austin away.
I picked up my phone and accepted the interview offer I'd been putting off for so long.
It was recommended-admission season, and I'd spent all this time weighing which school to choose.
Ashford, with the best career prospects for me, was all the way out in New York, and Austin worked at his family's company here. Choosing it meant three years apart.
Carlton, right here in Los Angeles, was a good school too, but it didn't come close to Ashford.
The old me would have compromised for Austin. I used to think a small concession here and there was nothing next to him.
But now I had no reason left to stay.
My whole life, I'd been waiting for a share of favoritism that was supposed to be mine.
I thought if I were good enough, my parents would finally see me. They never did. They'd always rather pour it all into Vivian, who couldn't hold a candle to me.
And now Austin had shown me the same truth.
The only thing I could truly hold onto was my own future. I shouldn't have hung all my hopes for something beautiful on a shadow that was never really there.
When my friends heard my decision, they were happy for me.
They asked what had changed my mind, and I told them why, laying out everything I'd learned from that secret account, exactly as it was.
At first they couldn't believe it. Then they were furious on my behalf.
Really, who could have imagined that a boyfriend who acted like he loved me so deeply had, underneath it all, been doing everything for someone else?
I couldn't have imagined it, and neither could they, so I didn't want to think about it anymore.
I didn't want to keep pinning my emotions on someone who wasn't worth it. I'd done enough of that already.
First I waited for my parents' favor, then for Austin's. Now I only wanted to think about myself.
I spent the next several days buried in the admission paperwork. The day my provisional acceptance from Ashford came through, Austin called.
"I'm eating out tonight, so I won't be coming home."
I used to believe Austin without question.
He'd say he was overseas closing a deal, or away on business, and even when he missed my birthday, missed Valentine's Day, I believed him, again and again.
Only now did I see how foolish that thinking had been.
I opened Vivian's secret account. She'd posted a new update: "Back in the country."
Austin had gone to see her. He'd forgotten today was the day my acceptance results came out. He hadn't asked a single word about it.
He'd long grown used to me revolving around him, treating him like my whole world. It had never once occurred to him that I might choose to leave.
When I got to Austin's place, I found a bouquet of tulips on the table, the kind Vivian liked, and beside it, the desserts she loved.
I don't like flowers, and I rarely eat sweets.
I gathered up everything of mine from all those years in his home, and just as I was about to leave, I ran into Austin and Vivian.
