“Mom, you don’t have to do this. I’m willing to save Ethan.”
At my words, Mary visibly relaxed. She released me and hurried back into the hospital room.
“Good. Go ask the doctor when the surgery can be scheduled. I need to stay with Ethan so he won’t be scared.”
Watching her back, tears broke free again.
Mom, I’m scared too.
When Dr. Brown heard my request, he looked shocked, carefully choosing his words.
“Your brother’s kidney donor isn’t that hard to find. It’s just that this hospital doesn’t have one right now. Other hospitals might. Are you sure you want to donate so quickly?”
I stayed silent, so he continued earnestly:
“Most donors are deceased. You’re still young. Losing a kidney will affect your future health.”
I forced a smile.
“My brother is young too. I don’t want him to suffer for so long. Doctor, please—when can the surgery be arranged?”
Dr. Brown sighed and agreed to check Ethan’s condition first.
Inside, Mary was tenderly coaxing Ethan to sleep, her gaze soft in a way I hadn’t seen directed at me for a long time.
“Doctor, since we have a match, when can we do the surgery?” she asked eagerly after his examination.
“His condition is stable. You could consider waiting for another donor. After all, your daughter is still very young—”
Mary cut him off, yanking me closer.
“Doctor, my son can’t wait! He’s so little. Why not use this kidney now that it’s available?”
Her nails dug into my skin. I didn’t even flinch.
As they argued, my eyes fell on the nightlight beside Ethan’s bed.
I had one just like it. Mary bought it for me the day I learned to sleep alone, saying it would stand in for her.
But when Ethan saw it, he wanted it too. I was afraid he’d break it, so I refused.
He grabbed at it anyway. The lamp toppled onto the carpet. As his hand reached for it, I yanked the carpet away. He fell backward, hitting the floor hard.
Mary walked in at that exact moment. I was still picking up the lamp when she rushed over, snatched it from me, and smashed it on the floor. The pieces scattered everywhere.
She scooped up the crying Ethan and stormed out, leaving me alone.
Later, she sold all the carpets she once laid down for me—just to buy Ethan a new nightlight.
Standing barefoot on the cold floor afterward, I felt the same chill that now froze my heart.
I thought my heart had already shattered like that lamp. I hadn’t expected her words could still hurt me so much.
When I came back to myself, Mary’s persistence had already won. Dr. Brown and she set a date for surgery. He gave me a sympathetic look before leaving.
Mary tucked Ethan in tenderly, then turned to me. A spark of hope flickered in my chest.
“Get plenty of rest these days. Staying up late isn’t good for your kidney. We can’t risk anything with the one you’re giving your brother.”
The light in my eyes dimmed again. I gave a bitter smile. What was I even hoping for?
