I do not remember everything that followed after I lost consciousness, only fragments that came and went like broken visions beneath a fading moon. Pain came in waves, distant voices spoke in hurried tones, and at times I felt a hand clasp mine firmly, urging me to hold on through the pull of darkness, as though someone refused to allow my spirit to slip beyond the veil.
When awareness finally returned to me, it was to the quiet rhythm of a healing chamber deep within the pack’s infirmary, where moonstone lamps cast a pale glow against stone walls and the air carried the sharp scent of medicinal herbs. My body felt foreign, as though I had been torn apart and stitched back together without the blessing of the Moon Goddess.
An elder healer stood beside me, his expression weighed down by something heavier than words.
“You were bleeding beyond what the body should endure,” he said gently, as though softness could dull truth. “We did what we could. The only path left to preserve your life was to sever the pregnancy.”
For a moment, I did not understand him. My mind lingered on the words as though they belonged to someone else’s fate, not mine. Then slowly, my hand moved to my abdomen, where there was only emptiness beneath my palm.
Gone.
Both of them.
My twins.
Something inside me did not break loudly. It did not shatter in a way that demanded sound or movement. It simply collapsed inward, like ice giving way beneath a frozen lake, swallowing everything without witness. I did not cry. I could not. I only accepted the scroll placed before me, my fingers unsteady as I pressed my seal upon it, as though even grief had become a ritual I no longer had strength to resist.
Yet while I lay in that silence, far from the warmth of life I had once carried within me, the world beyond my chamber continued without pause.
Lucan and Ellie were not grieving.
They were celebrating.
I do not know what compelled me to reach for the carved obsidian tablet beside my resting place, a warding crystal I had placed there days before without understanding why. Perhaps instinct, perhaps something deeper than thought, guided my hand as I activated the viewing spell etched within it, a simple enchantment meant to observe one’s dwelling from afar through moonstone reflection.
What appeared before me was not mercy.
It was betrayal made flesh.
My own chamber, the place that once held my laughter and my scent beneath woven furs, was no longer mine. Ellie stood there as though she had always belonged, draped in my silk robe, the same one I had woven beneath the blessing of the full moon. Lucan was with her, his presence careless and unrestrained, as though no sacred bond had ever existed between us.
Their laughter filled the room as they moved together upon the bed I had once shared my dreams upon, their words careless, unguarded, and cruel.
“She was always too soft,” Ellie said, her voice carrying a mocking sweetness as she leaned into him. “Too willing to believe in love where there was only convenience.”
Lucan’s laughter followed, low and unbothered. “She was simple to guide. Everything she gave, she gave freely. But you—” his voice deepened, heavier with desire, “—you are the one who makes me feel alive.”
I watched without blinking, though something within me was already fading beyond recognition.
When it was over, Ellie only rose slowly, as though nothing of consequence had taken place, while Lucan remained where he was, as if my absence had already been written into his future.
My fingers moved without thought then, sealing the vision into memory through the warding crystal, binding it beneath layers of enchantment meant for preservation. Not for now, but for later. For a time when grief would no longer be the only thing I carried.
Because something within me had already begun to change.
Grief was no longer all I had.
There was clarity now. And beneath it, something far colder taking root.
When I opened my eyes again, the chamber around me had softened into a quieter light, the harshness of healing replaced with stillness and the faint fragrance of white blossoms placed carefully along the stone ledges. Someone had tended to the space with deliberate care, as though attempting to restore what could no longer be repaired.
And then I felt it.
A hand holding mine.
I turned my head slowly.
Alaric.
For a moment, breath escaped me entirely, as though the world had stolen it without warning. The last time I had seen him, we were little more than children beneath the orphan grounds of the eastern valley, where he, son of a noble house, had once shared stolen hours with me away from watchful eyes. We had spoken then in hushed promises beneath the old willow, believing the world might one day allow such things to survive.
Then he vanished, taken away by his bloodline without farewell or choice.
And I had been taken away as well, before either of us could return to what we had lost.
Now he sat beside me as though time had only bent rather than broken us, his presence steady, his gaze carrying the same quiet strength I remembered from another life. The years had shaped him, but not erased him.
“You are safe now,” he said softly, as though the words themselves were meant to steady the fracture within me.
Something inside my chest trembled at the sound of his voice, and before I could stop myself, tears slipped free.
I did not know when I began to cry, only that I could not stop.
He did not hesitate. He only drew me into his arms as though I had always belonged there, as though no time had ever passed between what we were and what we had become. And for a fleeting moment, I allowed myself to exist within that fragile warmth, even as everything else inside me remained shattered.
But grief no longer stood alone within me.
There was something else now, coiling quietly beneath it.
Rage, cold and precise, shaped not by despair but by understanding.
They had taken everything from me and called it fate. Lucan, Ellie, all of them who had stood behind the lie.
But I was no longer willing to remain the part of their story written to suffer.
When I was finally discharged, I parted from Alaric with nothing more than a quiet thank you, though something in my gaze lingered longer than words could carry. That night, I told Lucan I would be away for a brief journey beyond the pack lands, and he kissed my forehead without hesitation, without question, as though I had never been anything more than something temporary within his reach.
I had almost left cleanly.
Until I returned to my chamber and saw it.
Red silk laid deliberately across my bed, not mine, but hers. A mark left without subtlety, without shame, as though meant to remind me that nothing within that space had ever truly been sacred.
I did not break.
I did not remain.
I simply closed my pack trunk, lifted my chin, and walked away as though I still belonged to the world I was leaving behind.
Because one day soon, I would no longer be the one walking away.
When I returned to my homeland beneath the silver watch of ancestral trees, my parents stood waiting beyond the threshold of the great hall, their relief so deep it bordered on disbelief. My mother embraced me as though afraid I would dissolve again into absence, while my father held his silence tightly, though his grip on my shoulder betrayed what he could not say.
“It is good to have you home,” he said at last, voice low.
My mother’s smile wavered as she added carefully, “There is an engagement meeting today. We did not wish to delay it any longer. Your union has already been arranged.”
I nodded without protest.
It did not matter to me then who awaited me beyond that decision.
Not until my brother Jace approached, his expression carrying something too amused to be innocent, as though he already knew how the threads of fate had begun to tighten again.
“You will find this interesting,” he said lightly. “The one chosen for you has returned from the western lands. He arrived only recently from Paris.”
I turned slowly, following his gaze without understanding what I was meant to see.
And then I saw him.
Alaric.
My first love.
The one who had held me together when everything else had fallen apart.
The one who had found me in the aftermath of ruin.
Was the man I had been told I would now bind my life to.
And for the first time, fate did not feel like mercy.
It felt like a reckoning waiting to unfold.
