The coffee machine in the break room had become my sanctuary over the past week. It was the one place where I could hide from Matthew's penetrating stares and the way he said my name like it left a bitter taste in his mouth. I was stirring sugar into my third cup of the morning when Jessica appeared beside me, her eyes bright with curiosity.
"So," she said, lowering her voice conspiratorially, "how exactly do you know our gorgeous new Creative Director?"
My hand stilled on the spoon. Through the glass partition, I could see Matthew in his corner office, his dark head bent over some documents. Even from here, the sight of him made my chest tighten with a familiar ache.
"We grew up together," I said carefully, not meeting Jessica's eager gaze.
"That's it? Just neighbors or something?"
The word 'just' stuck in my throat like a stone. How could I explain twenty years of shared secrets, scraped knees kissed better, homework sessions that turned into philosophical debates about everything and nothing? How could I describe the way he used to look at me like I hung the moon, or the way I'd thrown it all away for someone who couldn't even stay for our wedding?
"We're just childhood friends," I managed, the lie burning my tongue.
I didn't notice Matthew had appeared in the doorway until Jessica straightened up, suddenly flustered. "Oh! Mr. Morrison, I was just—"
"It's fine, Jessica." His voice was perfectly professional, but when I finally looked up, his expression had turned to stone. Something cold and distant flickered in his eyes before he turned away. "Laura, I need those Henderson campaign revisions on my desk by noon."
He was gone before I could respond, leaving me staring at the empty doorway with my heart hammering against my ribs. Just childhood friends. The words echoed in my head like an accusation.
That evening, I stayed late to finish the revisions, hoping the empty office would give me space to breathe. But as I gathered my things to leave, voices drifted from the women's restroom down the hall. I recognized the speaker immediately—Amanda from accounting, her voice carrying that particular tone women used when discussing office gossip.
"I'm telling you, Giselle's got her claws in deep," Amanda was saying. "Did you see her in his office yesterday? She was practically sitting on his lap while they went over those client files."
My feet stopped moving. Giselle—Matthew's assistant, all long legs and perfect blonde hair and the kind of confidence I'd never possessed.
"Well, can you blame her?" another voice replied—Sarah from HR. "The man's gorgeous, successful, and single. Plus, he seems to be warming up to her advances. I saw them having lunch together yesterday, and he was actually smiling."
Smiling. Matthew was smiling at Giselle, the same smile he used to save just for me.
"I give it two weeks before they're officially dating," Amanda continued. "She's exactly his type—sophisticated, put-together, not some mess who gets abandoned at the altar."
The words hit me like a physical blow. I pressed my back against the wall, my breathing shallow and rapid. Of course Matthew would be attracted to someone like Giselle. She was everything I wasn't—confident, successful, emotionally available. She probably never second-guessed herself or ran away from her feelings.
I waited until their voices faded before stumbling to the elevator, my vision blurring with unshed tears. As the floors ticked by, I caught my reflection in the polished steel doors—pale, hollow-eyed, still wearing the same haunted expression I'd had since Ryan left me at that altar.
No wonder Matthew looked at me like I was just another employee. No wonder he'd moved on. I'd had my chance four years ago, and I'd thrown it away. Now I had to watch him fall for someone else, someone who wouldn't be stupid enough to let him slip away.
The elevator doors opened to the parking garage, and I walked to my car on unsteady legs. Behind me, the office building rose into the night sky, its windows glowing like distant stars. Somewhere up there, Matthew was probably still working, maybe texting Giselle goodnight, maybe planning their next lunch date.
Just childhood friends. The phrase tasted like ashes in my mouth as I drove home through the empty streets, knowing I had no one to blame but myself for the distance between us.
