April screwed up her mouth and dropped the phone in my lap, annoyed.
Karen's impatient voice came through.
“Tony, what is this supposed to mean? It's not like I'm refusing to come back and marry you. Do you really have to blow it up like this?”
The sting in my nose vanished in an instant.
“Karen, after Marvin set his wedding date, I offered to move ours so you and your family could go to his. What did you say then?”
The line went quiet for a few breaths. Karen sighed.
“How was I supposed to know Marvin's wedding car would break down? Maybe it's all fate, maybe I'm meant to be there to see him happy. Can't you be a little more understanding? I'll tell my mom to let the Buddha thing go. We'll call it even!”
“No, we won't.”
I threw her own refusal back at her, word for word.
“You said our wedding date and the ceremony time were both picked by someone my parents brought in, that they were the luckiest possible timing for us, that they couldn't be changed.”
“And now, for Marvin, you've blown right past that lucky hour, and you want to strip the whole wedding down to nothing but guests sitting around eating.”
“You're trampling on everything I feel for you, you're throwing away everything my parents poured into this day, you're making a joke of my family and friends. And you think a jade Buddha squares that?”
Listening to me pour out everything at once, all the grief and anger, Karen felt she'd wronged me too, and unease welled up in her.
She covered the mouthpiece and turned to Marvin beside her.
“Marvin, I have to go.”
But Marvin's voice caught, thick with emotion.
“Kari, if you leave, and they take the after-party too far, and start giving your friend's wife a hard time, what then? If I step in to stop them, it'll only get worse.”
Thinking of all the ugly wedding-night stunts she'd seen online, Karen steeled herself and coaxed me.
“Tony! Your mom smashed the Buddha anyway, and there's no way to run the wedding the way it was planned now. So why don't we just not do ours today? Pick a new date, and I'll marry you in style!”
When I was the one asking to move the date, she wouldn't hear of it. Now she's left me hanging all day, my love and my dignity both gone, and she finally decides she's willing to reschedule. Too late.
In the family and friends group chat, dozens of people were asking me what was going on, whether the wedding was still happening.
Through tears, I typed one word.
【Happening!】
But to Karen, I said it plainly.
“Fine. We won't.”
She'd been about to hang up, but she caught the catch in my voice, and something in her chest clogged up and set her on edge, and she changed her mind again.
“Babe, if you really want the ceremony to feel like something, just grab anyone to walk through the motions. Once I'm done with the after-party and back, I'll apologize to everyone myself!”
Her idea and mine happened to line up.
I dialed my childhood friend.
“I'm short a bride at my wedding. Would you come?”
“Tony, are you sure?”
The next second, I heard Annabel Delgado start her car.
Last night, red-eyed, Annabel had made me a promise.
“Tony, if you're not happy after you're married, will you give me a chance? Whenever you need me, I'll be there.”
Last night I'd been so caught up in the joy of taking a wife that I swore up and down I'd grow old happy with Karen.
I never thought it would fall apart this fast.
My mother suddenly cried out at her phone, her face green with fury.
“This is too much! They don't see my son as a person at all!”
She handed me the phone to look.
It turned out Marvin, having made out like a bandit, had actually posted an update on social media, and it was blowing up.
【Thank you to my godmother for the heirloom jade Buddha, it's gorgeous! Thank you to Kari, who didn't even care about her own wedding and drove her brand-new bridal-gift car over to be my wedding car, and insisted on giving me the car too! My family, you're amazing! I'm so happy!】
The caption ran over a photo of April fastening the emerald jade Buddha around his neck, and another of the car keys I'd handed Karen when I went to bring her home this morning.
The comments were split down the middle.
A small number of people envied him for having family who spoiled him like that, with no blood between them.
But most of them said:
【Your happiness is built on the misery of Kari's husband. Please, everyone, like this so it gets to the top! Let the groom see it before he jumps into the fire!】
That comment got liked by countless people.
My parents' faces couldn't have looked worse. They met my eyes and gave one firm nod.
The nerves I'd held taut all day suddenly went slack.
I said to Annabel, light now.
“I'm sure. Wait for me to come marry you.”
But she said:
“No need. I'm almost at the hotel!”
