I used to be so certain he loved me.
He remembered my cramps came every month and always had ginger tea ready before I even asked. He knew I was afraid of the dark and never forgot to leave the nightlight on. No matter how late his business dinners ran, as long as he was sober enough to type, he'd send me a goodnight text. His plans for the future always included me. He'd even picked out names for our children.
But when I thought about that diary in the drawer, the certainty crumbled.
I'd come home that afternoon and couldn't resist any longer. I opened the drawer.
Beneath the yellowed photograph was a journal.
"April 3, 2017. Lena said she's like my shadow—wherever there's light, we'll never be apart. She's always afraid the light will go out and I won't be able to find her. How could that happen? She's taken root inside my heart. The only way to lose her would be to cut the heart out entirely."
"May 20, 2017. Lena gave me a photo of us together. She said we'd never be separated."
"August 15, 2017. Her mother's condition worsened. She cried so hard she couldn't breathe. I wanted to fly to her side, but I couldn't get time off during my internship. I wired her money. She sent it back. She said, 'Curtis, what we have shouldn't be tainted by money.'"
"October 22, 2017. She's decided to take a leave of absence and go home to care for her mother. She smiled at me through the glass, but it looked worse than crying. She told me to live well—her share too. But Lena, without you, how am I supposed to live at all?"
"January 3, 2018. She's busy. I can never reach her. It feels like the tide going out, and I can't hold on to anything."
"June 9, 2018. Lost contact completely. She deleted all her social media accounts. Her phone number is disconnected. Vanished without a trace. Lena, you're cruel."
The last page of the journal.
"June 30, 2018. Met a girl today. Her smile looks just like yours. Her name is Willow Sullivan, and her birthday is even the same day as yours. If that isn't fate, what is?"
Nothing after that.
Curtis stared at me for a long time.
Then he smiled, indulgent, as though I were a child throwing a tantrum.
"Come on, stop this. I know I shouldn't have left you on the side of the road today."
"But Lena was hurt. I had to take her to the hospital."
"I've already sent the car to the shop. It'll be good as new, I promise. Can you stop being upset now?"
A car could be fixed.
But a shattered heart—how do you fix that?
Tears spilled before I could stop them.
He didn't soften the way he used to. No tenderness, no concern. He paced in front of me, visibly irritated.
"Willow, can you stop being so unreasonable for once?"
"You can check my phone. You can look through my bank statements. What more do you want from me?"
"Lena has no parents. She's completely alone in this world. I'm not asking you to feel what she feels, but can't you show a shred of compassion?"
My chest locked up. I opened my mouth.
I wanted to tell him I was alone in this world now too.
I wanted to tell him I was the one who was hurt.
But in the end, all I wanted was to run.
The moment my feet hit the floor, a searing pain shot through me and I crumpled to the ground.
Curtis sighed, bent down, and carried me back to the bed.
I turned away, refusing to look at him. He grabbed my shoulders and forced me to face him.
"Willow, we promised each other we'd never go to bed angry. What exactly are you so upset about?"
When I still didn't answer, he leaned down and pressed his mouth hard against mine.
Back when things were good between us, he used to say there was nothing a night together couldn't fix.
My mother had been buried today. And he wanted—
Nausea surged through me. I shoved him off and slapped him across the face.
"Get out!"
Curtis ran his tongue along the inside of his cheek. His patience finally snapped.
