For five years, I nurtured a secret crush on my childhood friend. But when I found out he had feelings for the school's beauty queen, I decided to move on.
I asked for a different seat in class and stopped having meals, studying, or walking home with them. Before my mother and I relocated to another city, I discreetly placed the scarf I had lovingly knitted for him into the desk of the person seated in front of him.
"Thought you might appreciate this," I noted simply.
I never expected to cross paths with Benicio Montgomery again. However, when we met once more, that scarf, which was supposed to end up with someone else, was wrapped snugly around his neck.
Looking at the man standing close to me, emotion filled his eyes: “Did you abandon me?”
---
The day after the sports meet ended, a juicy piece of gossip spread through the school like wildfire. The top student, Benicio Montgomery, was rumored to be dating the school's darling, Adalynn Watson.
As their mutual friend, I was immediately bombarded by curious classmates when I returned to school.
"You three are always together. You must know what's going on, right?"
Faced with their eager, probing eyes, my mind drifted back to a recent video. A pang of bitterness settled in my heart. Had Adalynn not collapsed on the track during the 800-meter run from exhaustion, Benicio wouldn't have been caught on camera rushing to her aid, his face full of concern.
Up until now, I hadn't realized Benicio had feelings for Adalynn.
I should have seen it coming. On many occasions, when Adalynn came to the classroom window, I clearly noticed Benicio glancing at her with joy in his eyes.
How could I have been so oblivious?
Benicio and Adalynn were a perfect match in terms of family background and appearances—a prince and a princess. Even if Benicio had someone special in his heart, it made sense it was Adalynn.
Maybe spending so much time with them over the years made me forget that, at the core, we came from different worlds. My tie to them was only because my mom worked for Benicio's family.
The truth is, I never truly belonged to their circle. The cost of a dress Adalynn bought on a whim was equivalent to my mom's monthly salary, and Benicio's shoes never came cheap either.
With these thoughts swirling in my head, I shoved Benicio's birthday gift, which I had long prepared, deeper into my desk.
"I really don’t know anything about their relationship," I replied, feeling emotionally detached.
"How can you not know?" someone asked, their tone slightly confrontational. Others chimed in: "Are you trying to cover for them? Come on, spill the beans. We won’t tell anyone!"
"Exactly! When he saw Adalynn fall, his worried face said it all. There's no way he doesn't have feelings for her!"
Their barrage of questions encircled me, trapping me in a sea of inquisitive faces.
This was the first time in two years at this school I felt so visible. Yet, at this moment, I was irritated by the attention.
Unable to hold back, I snapped: "I said I don’t know! Can’t you get that?"
My outburst surprised everyone. Someone stepped aside, creating a gap in the crowd.
Through the gap, I saw Benicio and Adalynn standing on the outskirts of the commotion. I hadn’t noticed when they returned from the nurse's office.
Standing side by side, they looked like they belonged together, their shoulders almost touching, drawing the attention of everyone in the classroom and hallway.
With a calm demeanor, Benicio gazed at me: "Can we talk for a moment?"
Under the curious and gossip-hungry eyes of everyone, he asked me outside. He seemed unconcerned about any misunderstanding.
And, indeed, there was no need to worry about that. After all, no one would ever think there was anything between him and someone like me.
