Freya caught my hand, her whole face crowded with worry. "Ruby, listen. I know that Laurel Gilbert is no good. Her last marriage ended because her husband caught her running around behind his back."
"Lester's a teacher. The country's putting real weight on education now, so his standing's only going up. You divorce him and you're the one who loses out. You clawed your way through all these years. You want to just hand it all over to Laurel Gilbert?"
"And you're doing well now. Top marks in the evaluations, a promotion coming any day, off the line and done with weaving. A divorce could set all that back. Don't do something foolish."
Looking at how genuinely she worried for me, I knew she meant every word for my good. But I couldn't waste the rest of my life sunk in the mud.
So I told her. All ten years of it, right down to what had happened today.
By the time I finished, her eyes had gone red. "The rotten wretch. He's no kind of man. You've suffered for nothing."
"If you've truly thought it through, I'll write out your referral papers."
I nodded. "I've thought it through."
With the finished paperwork in my hand, I felt lighter than I had in a long time, so I stopped by the shop and bought a pound of pork ribs.
I'd barely stepped out the door when I saw Lester and Laurel looking at leather shoes together, leaning into each other, close as anything.
"These are too expensive, Lester. I couldn't."
But Lester only pinched her cheek, doting all over her. "I'm buying them for you. However much they cost, you're worth it."
"Only real leather heels like these are good enough for you."
Laurel flushed, all shy sweetness. "So has Lester ever bought heels for your wife?"
Lester gave a scornful little snort. "All day long she's either doing housework or off weaving at the mill. When's she going to wear heels? Buying her a pair would just be throwing money away."
Laurel let out a coy little sound. "I really am lucky, then, aren't I? Having you spoil me like this."
Standing there at the corner, I felt something heavy slam into my chest, so tight I couldn't breathe.
A year ago, when heels had just come into fashion, I'd wanted a pair too. His face had gone cold on the spot. "What do you want to go wasting money on that for? One pair of heels is half my monthly wages. Think how much rice that could feed the family. You've got no sense for running a household."
So it turned out that, in his eyes, I wasn't fit to wear heels.
It had nothing to do with running a household.
I turned with the meat in my hand and had taken only a few steps when someone blocked my way. It was Laurel.
She looked at me, pleased with herself. "You saw all of that just now, didn't you? Even married, the person who matters most to Lester is still me."
"And here's something else for you. All these years, every ration coupon for cloth and meat his unit handed out, he gave them to me. He said you weren't fit to wear anything good and didn't need to eat meat, either."
Then she flicked a glance at the ribs in my hand. "I like my ribs braised. Remember to go heavy on the sugar."
With that she turned and walked off, all smiles, stepping back so she blocked me from Lester's line of sight.
And I stood rooted there, my legs shaking and refusing to stop.
Back when Lester and I first came home from the countryside, he'd said he wanted to sit for college. But no one in his family would put him through it, so I pretended I had no wish to go, then buried myself in the textile mill to pay for his schooling.
By the time he'd graduated and been assigned a job, five years had gone by. He never once brought a cloth or meat coupon home for me. He said the school didn't hand those out, and I believed him.
So it turned out they'd all gone to someone else, and I was the one who'd eaten ten years of bitterness for his sake.
I would never eat that bitterness again. I walked off quickly, and then I knocked on that weathered little wooden door.
"Ruby, what brings you by at this hour?"
I lifted a smile and gave the ribs in my hand a little shake. "I've been wanting your braised pork ribs."
My mother looked me over, then took the ribs from me. "All right. Let's eat first. Whatever it is, we'll talk after dinner."
