Four:
After a long day at work.
Belinda and Alden came home.
The moment they walked in, they saw me standing by the door without a single drop of sweat on me, not looking at all like someone who'd baked in the heat all day. Their brows knit together, and they rushed straight to the electric meter box.
They seemed to want the meter to prove I'd been wasting power at home, being wasteful, un-eco-friendly, so they could stand on the moral high ground and point their fingers at me.
But then they looked.
Both of them froze, because the reading was exactly the same as the photo they'd taken of it when they left that morning.
"How is this even possible? Why hasn't the meter moved a single kilowatt-hour? Did you break it?"
"You didn't run the AC at home, fine, that's a fact. But there's no way you didn't at least turn on a fan. You don't look like someone who sweated through a whole day."
"So now you're not just being wasteful, you've actually stooped to stealing electricity, which is against the law!"
They weren't wrong. I really hadn't baked in the heat all day.
I'm not an idiot, after all.
This is the hottest stretch of the year. The forecast said a hundred and two, and the "feels like" on my phone was pushing a hundred and fifteen. If I'd sat home without the AC at high noon, I'd have been steamed alive.
So I'd actually spent the whole day in an air-conditioned hotel room and timed my return for right when they got off work.
Not that I'd ever tell them that.
I just said, smug all over my face,
"I didn't break the meter."
"The reason the house didn't use a single kilowatt-hour is that I sold off every appliance we own. I even threw out the phone chargers."
"Because I decided Belinda was right. We have to go green. The AC heats up the environment, but using all this electricity like we do also releases huge amounts of carbon, causes global warming, air pollution, and resource depletion."
"And besides, didn't you say it yourselves? Back before we had electricity, everyone got along just fine. So I just took the idea and ran with it."
Five:
Belinda and Alden shot each other a look, faces full of disbelief, and bolted for the living room.
But it didn't take long for them to believe it.
Where the freestanding AC unit used to sit in the living room, there was now a potted plant.
The TV that used to hang on the wall was gone, replaced by Belinda and Alden's wedding photo.
The wall-mounted AC units in all three bedrooms and the study were gone too, leaving only big holes. Even the fridge, the washing machine, and the smart toilet were gone...
The two of them stood there stunned for a while before it registered, and then they pointed at me and let loose.
"Have you lost your mind?"
"We just told you not to run the AC. What's the meaning of selling off all these appliances? Are you doing this on purpose to make us look like fools?"
"Get every last thing back here right now!"
I spread my hands.
"They've all been sold for scrap. How am I supposed to get them back?"
"How could I possibly be making you look like fools? You two love the environment. No effort is too small when it comes to going green. What if the planet was hanging on just this one person, just this one kilowatt-hour?"
"Don't worry. A calm heart keeps you cool."
"I made a point of buying a few all-natural palm-leaf fans, and three big winter melons too. If we hold the fans and hug the melons, we definitely won't get too hot."
"And with the TV and everything else gone, our family can chat more, grow closer. It's the best of both worlds!"
I was thoroughly enjoying myself.
Belinda and Alden, on the other hand, were livid.
Sweat poured down their faces like water, and Belinda's makeup ran right off.
"Grace Dickerson! You're picking a fight on purpose, aren't you?"
"I wouldn't let you run the AC, so you're bitter, and now you're tormenting us like this on purpose, right?"
But no matter what Belinda said.
I kept my innocent face.
I even pulled out my phone and showed Belinda the eco-friendly tips an AI app had given me, proof that I truly love the environment and wasn't doing this to torment anyone.
