My head went off like a bomb, and the pain in my chest was sharp as a needle.
Company policy spelled it out in black and white: no office romances, and if one was found out, one of the two had to resign.
Afraid someone would report us, Amos and I had always acted like strangers at work.
We took different routes coming and going.
We never went anywhere crowded on dates.
In public, we never so much as touched.
Five years, and no one had ever caught on.
Yet last night, he and Cecily had somehow been seen by a coworker.
Whether it was carelessness or the two of them unable to help themselves, only he knew.
I brushed Lena off with a few words and walked quickly back to my desk to sort my things.
Then my phone rang.
Amos, anxious: "Come up to the roof. I need to talk to you about something."
I'd barely stepped onto the roof when he yanked me into a corner.
"Narelle, listen to me. Photos of me and Cecily from last night got sent to the board by my worst rival."
"The board won't hear a word of my explanation. Now they want one of us, me or Cecily, to resign voluntarily."
"Cecily's been crying ever since she found out."
"You know how hard she's fought just to get a foothold here. She shouldn't have to get dragged into this."
I asked flatly, "So?"
Amos paused.
"You go tell the board that you and I are the couple. Don't make Cecily take the fall for us."
"Don't worry. This is a critical time for my promotion. Once you quit, I'll take care of you."
Something tore open in my chest, wide, the wind howling straight through.
"So what you're saying is, to save the two of you, I should be the one to resign?"
"Narelle, this is the best solution I can come up with."
My eyes burned. My nails dug deep into my palms and I couldn't even feel it.
"So in your best solution, I'm the one who deserves to be sacrificed. Is that it?"
Amos glanced at me, guilt written all over him.
"How can you put it like that? It's just that Cecily and I need this job more."
"And me? I don't need it?"
Amos gripped my shoulders tight with both hands.
"You still have me, don't you? Once we're married, wouldn't it be even better for you to be a stay-at-home wife?"
"You're going to quit sooner or later anyway, so why not now? This way it's good for all three of us."
There was a thorn stuck in my throat.
I couldn't swallow it, couldn't spit it out.
I could resign on my own terms, but not like this.
All these years I'd given it everything, worked on my proposals harder than anyone.
Every plan I stayed up all night making got filed under his name.
That was what carried him, one step at a time, up to director.
I'd given so much, and in the end I was the first shield he shoved out in front of himself.
Seeing my eyes go red,
Amos gently pulled me into his arms again and murmured to comfort me.
"Narelle, I know I've put you through a lot."
"Here's what we'll do. Once I get the promotion and the raise, we'll get married."
"I'll make you the happiest bride in the world."
My tears wouldn't stop.
Each one landed on my heart and left a dense little crater.
I wasn't going to be his bride.
My wedding was the day after tomorrow, set in the Maldives.
My fiancé was busy with the nervous preparations. Mom said he wanted to give me a grand wedding.
The moment I thought of that, the ache suddenly lifted.
Mom was right. The best way to end one relationship is to start another.
I wiped my tears and pulled free of Amos's arms.
"Fine. I'll go resign."
Amos let out a breath and looked at me, relieved.
"Narelle, I knew you were the best. About last night, when I didn't come home, let me explain—"
I cut him off.
"No need. One of you is my best friend, the other's my boyfriend. I trust you both."
I saw the panic in his eyes plain as day.
But I didn't call it out.
Everyone has secrets.
He could keep his from me, and I could choose to leave without a sound.
"I want to get away for a bit. I'm leaving this afternoon."
"Then I'll see you off," Amos blurted out.
Something in my chest stalled.
He didn't even care where I was going, for how long, or when I'd be back.
"Go to work. I'll take a cab to the airport myself."
"All right. Text me when you land."
