ALYSSA'S POV
The steady, rhythmic beep... beep... beep... was the first thing that pulled me back from the darkness.
My eyes fluttered open, squinting against the harsh glow of the fluorescent lights overhead. My head felt like it had been cracked open, a dull throb pulsating behind my temples.
As I shifted, trying to push myself up from the thin mattress, a nurse appeared at my side. Her hands were gentle as she adjusted my pillows to help me sit.
"Easy now," she whispered, checking the IV line in my arm. "You had quite a fall, and your body temperature was dangerously low." She paused, her expression softening into a small, professional smile.
"But you’re lucky. Congratulations, ma'am. You’re pregnant."
“You need to be very careful not to stress yourself out right now."
My breath hitched.
The air in the room suddenly felt too thin to breathe.
Pregnant?
For eight years, I had prayed for this. I had spent countless nights crying into my pillow, thinking that if I could just give Nick a child, he would finally see me.
I thought a baby would be the anchor that kept him from drifting toward Lily. And now, at the very moment I had decided to walk away, the universe had handed me the one thing I used to want most.
My hand instinctively moved to my still-flat stomach. Tears stung my eyes, but they weren't tears of joy. They were tears of mourning for a dream that had arrived far too late.
"Who brought me here?" I asked, my voice raspy.
"The gentleman didn't want us to mention his name," the nurse replied.
"He just said to tell you he’d be back to get you in a few hours. He made sure your bill was settled before he stepped out."
I leaned my head back against the pillow and closed my eyes.
Ethan.
He was always like that. The silent guardian, the one who stepped into the gaps Nick left behind.
While my husband was throwing me into the rain, the man I had rejected was paying my hospital bills.
A hollow ache settled in my chest.
Even now, a small, pathetic part of me had hoped the nurse would say it was Nick.
I wanted to believe that he had found me in the mud, realized his cruelty, and carried me to safety. But I was just writing fairytales again.
Nick didn't want me; he only wanted the broken version of me that lived to serve his ego.
"Be careful with your baby," the nurse reminded me as she checked my vitals."Your body is fragile after the exposure."
"When can I leave?" I asked.
"The doctor has cleared you. You can be discharged whenever you feel ready." I nodded. I wasn't going to overstay my welcome.
With her help, I signed the papers.
By the time I reached the house, the sun had long since set.
The heavy oak door felt like lead as I pushed it open and…my heart gave out a loud thud.
Nick was sitting on the edge of the sofa, a bowl of steaming soup in his hand. He was leaning over Lily, blowing gently on a spoonful before hovering it near her lips. The tenderness in his eyes was a look I hadn’t seen directed at me in years.
I stumbled slightly toward the stairs, the movement catching his attention. He froze, the spoon still inches from Lily’s mouth.
"You’re finally back," he said, his voice dropping several degrees into an icy chill. "Where have you been?"
"I’ve been at the hospital," I replied blandly. My voice sounded hollow, even to my own ears.
Nick’s brow furrowed, and he set the soup bowl down on the coffee table. For a fleeting second, his gaze softened. "What’s wrong?"
A bitter, hysterical laugh bubbled in my throat, but I choked it back.
What was wrong? He had literally tossed me out into a torrential downpour and locked the door.
"I had hypothermia. But I’m fine now."
He gave a sharp nod, not even caring to ask how I got to the hospital…how I was.
Few years ago, he would have at least asked but now…Just a nod.
"You really shouldn't have pushed my hand, Alyssa. If you hadn't forced me to lock you out, none of that would have happened."
The air left my lungs.
My fist clenched at my sides. He was doing it again—he was carefully shifting the blame onto me until I was the one gasping under the pressure.
"Come sit," he sighed, gesturing to the armchair opposite them.
I obeyed, my body moving on autopilot. Lily watched me, her eyes glinting with a triumphant smirk, but I refused to look at her. I kept my hand pressed flat against my own stomach as I plumped down in the chair.
"I’ve got good news to share," Nick started. He reached out, patting Lily’s hair with a possessive gentleness. She beamed at him, leaning into his touch. "The doctor came by to check on Lily’s health today. And guess what? Lily is pregnant."
Thud.
Thud.
Thud.
Everything blurred. That high-pitched whine clouded my ears as I tried to place the words.
I stared at Lily’s belly, watching as she began to caress it with a sickening pride.
How ironic.
The universe had played a cruel joke on me.
Why?
Why was it that at the exact moment I finally carried the child I thought would save us, he had given that same gift to the woman tearing us apart.
"You aren't happy, Alyssa?" Nick’s voice pierced through the fog.
I looked at him, a single tear finally escaping and rolling down my cold cheek.
The indifference in his eyes was absolute. He truly expected me to celebrate his betrayal.
"Congratulations," I whispered, the word tasting like ash. I wiped the tear, sniffing hard. "Anything else? I’d like to rest."
"Actually, yes. I want you to vacate the master bedroom. Lily is pregnant now, and she deserves the larger space."
“The bed is softer, and there's more room for her to be comfortable." Nick said, his tone casual, as if he were asking for a glass of water.
I swallowed hard against the lump in my throat.
The audacity of him to ask me to hand over my matrimonial bed. That was the same bed we both slept on. The same bed he promised to always respect. He knew how much our matrimonial bed…our matrimonial home meant to me! Now, he wanted me out just so his mistress could feel comfortable?
"Don't be selfish, Alyssa," he added, noticing my silence. "She's only going to use it for eight months, and then you’ll have it back."
"It’s okay, Nick," Lily pouted, her voice dripping with false sweetness. "If she doesn't want to give it up, I'll just stay in the guest room. The baby and I will get used to it."
It was pathetic looking at the two doddles while I hadn't said a thing to agree and disagree.
"No," Nick snapped, his temper flaring. He turned back to me, his voice rising. "She’s only sharing the bed! You’d still be my wife, isn't that enough for you?"
"Okay," I muttered, cutting him off.
He froze. He probably hadn't expected me to accept that easily. I flashed him a smile and I turned to leave, my legs feeling like they belonged to someone else.
“I love her so much… so much I could die for her. I doubt I’d ever survive if she left me.” those words resounded in my head and I almost scoffed.
He loved me so much he'd die for me? Yet he got another girl pregnant and he didn't just flaunt it in my face but wants me to be over the moon and happily hand over my matrimonial room.
Another tear slid down my cheek. My chest was constricting so bad, I could hear constant thudding. I brush the tear off, pushing our room door open.
I pushed my feet toward the desk picking up a photo frame that laid lazily on the table; it was a picture of our wedding picture. A lazy smile grazed my lips as I caressed his lips, the damn finally breaking through.
I didn't know how long I sat crumbling on the floor, how long I had the photo pressed to my frame but finally I found the strength to remain strong, to wipe the tears off my face.
Gently, I set the photo down and got on my feet. Almost immediately, the door was pushed open and Nick stepped in and surprisingly, alone.
I ignored him and made for the wardrobe. I pushed the wardrobe open, pulled out my suitcase and began stuffing my dress in.
“Are you okay, Alyssa?” His voice rang out, stopping me right in place.
My gaze shifted to his, he had a sore look on but it almost felt like he was rubbing salt on my wound.
I almost scoffed, for the past four years he never asked nor cared and now he just remembered I've got feelings too.
I gave a curt nod not trusting my voice, not trusting I wouldn't explode.
“I…” The shrill ringing of my phone cut him off. I pulled down the blouse I was folding and headed in his direction.
I brushed past him and bent to pick up my phone from the table. Staring at the caller ID, I froze. It read; Ethan Vance.
I quickly snatched the phone off the stand and wiped the red button and all I could do was pray Nick didn't notice the caller ID.
"Why's Ethan Vance calling you?” my heart constricted.
Before I could find an excuse, he grabbed me by the arm harshly, his gaze radiating fury. "Are you having an affair?”
My blood ran cold. The fear in my blood instantly replaced with that terrifying force of anger.
I snapped his hand off me and before I could stop myself, my hand connected with his cheek.
"Don't you dare question my commitment, Nick," I hissed, my vision blurred by fresh tears. "Not everyone is like you."
Nick stumbled back, his hand flying to his reddened cheek. I stared at my hand regretting instantly.
I swallowed hard expecting him to lash out, to result in domestic violence, instead his gaze softened; a flicker of guilt or perhaps shock crossing his features.
"I would never cheat on you," I whispered, more to myself than him. "No matter what you do, I won't."
“I'm…I'm sorry" his stuttered.
Sorry?
I couldn't remember the last time he said those words. I didn't know what he was sorry for— toying with me, making me a laughing stock, humiliating me, degrading me, or getting some else pregnant?
No matter what he was sorry for, it really didn't matter anymore.
I gave another curt nod. It was the truth, I'd never cheat on him, instead I'd obey his actions, I’d set him free.
I walked past him, heading back for my suitcase.
"You don't need to move out today, you can tomorrow. You seem wounded,” He muttered. I stopped right at my track and turned to him. His fist kept balling and unballing as if he was trying to hold himself back and finally, he let out a sigh.
He walked toward me, past me and then for the suitcase. He pulled out the blouse I'd folded earlier, placed it back into the hanger and hung it back in the wardrobe. He stuffed the suitcase back in and shut the wardrobe.
I didn't stop him; there was no use anyways. Instead, I turned and made for the bed, pulling the sheets over me.
I shut my eyes blocking out all thought and forcing myself to sleep.
I heard him sleep into the other side of the bed and I instinctively shifted further apart from him.
As much as I didn't want to say a thing anymore, he deserved to know that I'm pregnant but does he need such news when he's going to become a father anyways? Even if it's not with me.
